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How can you create closeness when the two of you are hundreds of miles apart? How can you make the person that you are talking to on the phone feel special when you cannot pat their back or give them a little hug? The answer is simple. Just use your caller¡¯s name far more often than you would in person. In fact, shower your conversations with his or her name. Saying a person¡¯s name too often (in face-to-face conversation) sounds manipulative. However, on the phone the effect is dramatically different.If you heard someone say your name, even if you were being pushed around in a big noisy crowd, you would pay attention and listen.
¨ç ¸Ö¸® »ç´Â Ä£±¸¿ÍÀÇ ¿ìÁ¤À» À§ÇØ °¡²û¾¿ ÀüÈÇضó.
¨è ´ëÈ Áß¿¡´Â »ó´ëÀÇ ¸öÁþ¿¡ ³ªÅ¸³ª´Â Àǹ̸¦ Àß »ìÆì¶ó.
¨é °ø°øÀå¼Ò¿¡¼´Â ³Ê¹« Å« ¼Ò¸®·Î ÀüÈ Åëȸ¦ ÇÏÁö ¸¶¶ó.
¨ê ½Ã²ô·¯¿î Àå¼Ò¿¡¼ Ä£±¸¿Í ´ëÈÇÒ ¶§´Â Æò¼Òº¸´Ù õõÈ÷ ¸»Çضó.
¨ë ÀüÈ ÅëÈ¿¡¼ Ä£¹Ð°¨À» ÁÖ·Á¸é »ó´ëÀÇ À̸§À» ÀÚÁÖ ºÒ·¯ÁÖ¾î¶ó.
1. ³»¿ëÇ®ÀÌ
¸Ö¸® ¶³¾îÁ® ÀÖ´Â »óȲ¿¡¼ ÀüÈ·Î »ó´ë¹æÀÌ Æ¯º°ÇÏ´Ù°í ´À³¢°Ô ÇÏ´Â ¹æ¹ýÀ» ¼³¸íÇÏ°í ÀÖÀ¸¸ç, ±× ±¸Ã¼ÀûÀÎ ¹æ¹ýÀ¸·Î Á÷Á¢ ¸¸³ª¼ ¾ê±âÇÒ ¶§º¸´Ù ÈξÀ ´õ ¸¹ÀÌ »ó´ë¹æÀÇ À̸§À» ºÎ¸£¶ó°í ¸»ÇÏ°í ÀÖ´Ù. ¡®¨ë ÀüÈ ÅëÈ¿¡¼ Ä£¹Ð°¨À» ÁÖ·Á¸é »ó´ëÀÇ À̸§À» ÀÚÁÖ ºÒ·¯ÁÖ¾î¶ó.¡¯°¡ ÇÊÀÚÀÇ ÁÖÀåÀÓ.
2. ±¸¹®Çؼ³
¨ç [How can you create closeness when the two of you are hundreds of miles apart?] ¡Øcreate closeness:Ä£¹ÐÇÑ °ü°è¸¦ ÀÌ·ç´Ù. ¡Øthe two of you:³ÊÈñ µÎ »ç¶÷ ¡Øbe hundreds of miles apart:¼ö¹é¸¶ÀÏ ¶³¾îÁ® ÀÖ´Ù. ¢Ñ³ÊÈñ µÎ »ç¶÷ÀÌ ¼ö¹é ¸¶ÀÏ ¶³¾îÁ® ÀÖÀ» ¶§ ¾î¶»°Ô Ä£¹ÐÇÑ °ü°è¸¦ ÀÌ·ê ¼ö ÀÖÀ»±î?
¨è [How can you make [the person (that) you are talking to on the phone] feel special when you cannot pat their back or give them a little hug?] ¡Ømake(»ç¿ªµ¿»ç)+¸ñÀû¾î+µ¿»ç¿øÇü ¡Ø[the person (that) you are talking to on the phone]: ´ç½ÅÀÌ ÀüÈ·Î À̾߱â ÇÏ´Â »ç¶÷(¸ñÀû¾î) ¡Øpat their back:±×µéÀÇ µîÀ» µÎµå¸®´Ù.(pat:°¡º±°Ô µÎµå¸®´Ù) ¡Øgive ~a little hug:~¸¦ °¡º±°Ô Æ÷¿ËÇÏ´Ù. ¢Ñ´ç½ÅÀÌ ÀüÈ·Î À̾߱âÇÏ´Â »ç¶÷ÀÇ µîÀ» µÎµå·ÁÁְųª ÀÛÀº Æ÷¿ËÀ» ÇØÁÙ ¼ö ¾øÀ» ¶§ ¾î¶»°Ô ±× »ç¶÷ÀÌ Æ¯º°ÇÏ´Ù°í ´À³¢°Ô ¸¸µé¾îÁÙ ¼ö ÀÖÀ»±î?
¨é [The answer is simple. Just use your caller¡¯s name far more often than you would (use your caller¡¯s name) in person. In fact, shower your conversations with his or her name.] ¡Øyour caller¡¯s name:ÀüÈ °Ç »ç¶÷ÀÇ À̸§ ¡Øfar more often:ÈξÀ ´õ ÀÚÁÖ(far:ºñ±³±Þ°Á¶) ¡Øin person:´ë¸éÇÏ¿©(Á÷Á¢ ¸¸³ª¼), Á÷Á¢, ¸ö¼Ò ¡Øshower ¨Í with ¨Î: ¨Í¿¡°Ô ¨Î¸¦ Æۺ״Ù(¾Æ³¦¾øÀÌ ÁÖ´Ù) ¢ÑÇØ´äÀº °£´ÜÇÏ´Ù. ´ÜÁö Á÷Á¢ ¸¸³¯ ¶§º¸´Ù ÈξÀ ´õ ÀÚÁÖ ÀüÈ °Ç »ç¶÷ÀÇ À̸§À» »ç¿ëÇضó. »ç½Ç»ó ´ç½ÅÀÇ ´ëȸ¦ ±× »ç¶÷ÀÇ À̸§À¸·Î È컶 Àû¼Å¶ó. Á÷Á¢ ´ë¸éÇÏ´Â ´ëÈ¿¡¼ ³Ê¹« ÀÚÁÖ »ç¶÷ÀÇ À̸§À» ¸»ÇÏ´Â °ÍÀº ±³È°ÇÏ°Ô µé¸± ¼ö ÀÖ´Ù.
¨ê [Saying a person¡¯s name too often (in face-to-face conversation) sounds manipulative. However, on the phone the effect is dramatically different.] ¡Øface to face:¾ó±¼À» ¸Â´ë°í, Á÷Á¢ ´ë¸éÇÏ´Â ¡Ø in face-to-face conversation:Á÷Á¢ ´ë¸éÇÏ´Â ´ëÈ¿¡¼ ¡Øsounds manipulative:Á¶ÀÛÇÏ´Â (¼ÓÀÌ´Â) °Íó·³ µé¸°´Ù.(manipulative:¼ÓÀÓ¼öÀÇ, Á¶ÀÛÇÏ´Â) ¡Øon the phone:ÀüȻ󿡼´Â ¢ÑÁ÷Á¢ ´ë¸éÇÏ´Â ´ëÈ¿¡¼ ³Ê¹« ÀÚÁÖ »ç¶÷ÀÇ À̸§À» ¸»ÇÏ´Â °ÍÀº ±³È°ÇÏ°Ô µé¸± ¼ö ÀÖ´Ù. ±×·¯³ª ÀüȻ󿡼´Â ±× È¿°ú°¡ ±ØÀûÀ¸·Î ´Ù¸£´Ù.
¨ë [If you heard someone say your name, even if you were being pushed around in a big noisy crowd, you would pay attention and listen.] ¡Øpush around:Â÷º°´ë¿ìÇÏ´Ù, ¶°¹Ð´Ù(be pushed around: Â÷º°´ë¿ì¸¦ ¹Þ´Ù, ¶°¹Ð·Á ´Ù´Ï´Ù.) ¡Øpay attention:ÁÖÀǸ¦ ±â¿ïÀÌ´Ù ¢Ñ´©±º°¡°¡ ´ç½ÅÀÇ À̸§À» ¸»ÇÏ´Â °ÍÀ» µè´Â´Ù¸é, ´ç½ÅÀÌ ½Ã²ô·¯¿î °Å´ë ±ºÁß ¼Ó¿¡¼ ±«·Î¿î »óȲ¿¡ óÇØ ÀÖ´Ù ÇÒÁö¶óµµ, ´ç½ÅÀº ÁÖÀǸ¦ ±â¿ïÀÌ°í µè°Ô µÉ °ÍÀÌ´Ù.
3. ´Ü¾îÁ¤¸®
*closeness Ä£¹Ð *pat °¡º±°Ô Ä¡´Ù, Åä´Ú°Å¸®´Ù *in person Á÷Á¢ ¸¸³ª¼ *shower Æۺ״٠*face-to-face ´ë¸éÇÏ¿© *manipulative ±³¹¦ÇÏ°Ô ´Ù·ç´Â, ¼ÓÀÓ¼öÀÇ *dramatically ±ØÀûÀ¸·Î *push around ±«·ÓÈ÷´Ù, Â÷º°´ë¿ì¸¦ ÇÏ´Ù.
4. Àü¹®Çؼ³
³ÊÈñ µÎ »ç¶÷ÀÌ ¼ö¹é ¸¶ÀÏ ¶³¾îÁ® ÀÖÀ» ¶§ ¾î¶»°Ô Ä£¹ÐÇÑ °ü°è¸¦ ÀÌ·ê ¼ö ÀÖÀ»±î? ´ç½ÅÀÌ ÀüÈ·Î À̾߱âÇÏ´Â »ç¶÷ÀÇ µîÀ» µÎµå·ÁÁְųª ÀÛÀº Æ÷¿ËÀ» ÇØÁÙ ¼ö ¾øÀ» ¶§ ¾î¶»°Ô ±× »ç¶÷ÀÌ Æ¯º°ÇÏ´Ù°í ´À³¢°Ô ¸¸µé¾îÁÙ ¼ö ÀÖÀ»±î? ÇØ´äÀº °£´ÜÇÏ´Ù. ´ÜÁö Á÷Á¢ ¸¸³¯ ¶§º¸´Ù ÈξÀ ´õ ÀÚÁÖ ÀüÈ °Ç »ç¶÷ÀÇ À̸§À» »ç¿ëÇضó. »ç½Ç»ó ´ç½ÅÀÇ ´ëȸ¦ ±× »ç¶÷ÀÇ À̸§À¸·Î È컶 Àû¼Å¶ó. Á÷Á¢ ´ë¸éÇÏ´Â ´ëÈ¿¡¼ ³Ê¹« ÀÚÁÖ »ç¶÷ÀÇ À̸§À» ¸»ÇÏ´Â °ÍÀº ±³È°ÇÏ°Ô µé¸± ¼ö ÀÖ´Ù. ±×·¯³ª ÀüȻ󿡼´Â ±× È¿°ú°¡ ±ØÀûÀ¸·Î ´Ù¸£´Ù. ´©±º°¡°¡ ´ç½ÅÀÇ À̸§À» ¸»ÇÏ´Â °ÍÀ» µè´Â´Ù¸é, ´ç½ÅÀÌ ½Ã²ô·¯¿î °Å´ë ±ºÁß ¼Ó¿¡¼ ±«·Î¿î »óȲ¿¡ óÇØ ÀÖ´Ù ÇÒÁö¶óµµ, ´ç½ÅÀº ÁÖÀǸ¦ ±â¿ïÀÌ°í µè°Ô µÉ °ÍÀÌ´Ù.
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